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Whatever Things are Smarmy, Snarky and Ugly

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Blogger: Wendy Lawton

The following blog  first posted two years ago. I was just looking at it and shaking my head with the realization that so little has changed. Whatever. . .

I have a serious case of outrage fatigue. Facebook posts are filled with outrage. It’s true, many of the issues discussed are worthy of outrage but with some sixteen months of politics and mudslinging ahead of us let me challenge you to follow some wise advice. It comes from Philippians 4:8. Let’s take it apart:

Whatever is true: Be careful with your shares and retweets. Is it true? If a story seems too miraculous or too farfetched, take the time to check it out on Snopes.com and other debunking sites. So many well-meaning people end up looking like fools when they post long-debunked urban myths. And news story shares. . . is it a reputable source? Is it opinion or is it true?

Whatever is noble: It may be true, but is it something you want connected with your name and with your professional persona? Comments about those who’ve famously fallen from grace do nothing but titillate. Those of us suffering outrage fatigue simply cannot stand the huge wave of outrage that we see on the horizon. I think it came to a head for me when my newsfeed began to fill with outrage about Cecil the lion who was killed by a big game hunter. Yes, it was needless and heartbreaking but we read about it for days and days. And then the backlash came– the picture of starving children from the same region with the finger wagging, “People care more about one aged lion than about. . .” There’s precious little any of us can do about any of it but feel somehow guilty.Jackson Hole

Whatever is right: And by right, we mean righteous, not a specific political stance. 🙂 I’m of the keep-your-political-views-to-yourself persuasion. Many do not agree and I’ll not judge but just remember, the closer to the election, the more rabidly partisan people become. Do you want to alienate roughly half your readership? Focus on the things that are righteous. The good being done in the world to alleviate suffering. The upstanding. Troubling world situations to help highlight prayer concerns— this too is right.

Whatever is pure: We love pure. These are the things that bring tears to our eyes. Things that are purely sweet, purely funny with no evil intended. Children dressed for the first day of school. Weddings. Old folks dancing up a storm. Little faces from around the world. Grandparents and grandchildren. All a breath of pure, clean air.

Whatever is lovely: I’m a big fan of lovely. I love it when people post pictures of their gardens, of the beach, of the food they’ve created, of babies. . . Loveliness can lift our spirits. In fact someone did a study of people who look at kitten videos. Do you know it lowered stress and increased happiness? People need to apply the “lovely” yardstick and rethink much that is posted online– bodily functions included. There’s way too much yuck factor and far too many TMI posts to my way of thinking.

Whatever is admirable: How we love to hear stories of heroes and people doing admirable things. Let’s continue with tributes to those we love. Causes that are admirable. Concrete ways we can help. So much better than focusing on the snarky, smarmy, ugly, right?

So be prepared. Heartbreaking news continues to release about wars. We’ll be hearing more and more about feet of clay, political haranguing, horrible tragedies and evil acts. Just remember—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

So what do you think?  Anyone else suffering from outrage fatigue? Do you believe one can actually change another person’s mind politically by arguing online? Does the “whatever principle” apply if your brand is an in-your-face brand? Let’s talk. . .

And a note here about when I say “let’s talk:” I love commenting along with you but I’ve been absent from the conversation for much of the last couple of weeks. I’ve been under the weather, so to speak, but am healing and will be back atcha soon. 🙂

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  1. Sorry to hear you’ve been feeling poorly, Wendy. Glad you’re feeling better.

    *I agree that we should THINK before we post. Before hitting “submit,” let’s ask whether what we’re posting is True, Helpful, Inspiring, Necessary, and Kind.

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  2. Ah, Wendy, attitude impacts the healing process. True, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable boost well-being. Outrage drains it. So focus on the positive and feed your recovery!
    * I am Facebook friends with many of the girls I taught in Vacation Bible School, now teens and young women. I jump at every chance to leave a positive comment, and I take their negative posts as a call to prayer.
    * As I scan the Scriptures, I see that Jesus said precious little about politics–just “render unto Caesar” and “go the extra mile.” As always, he is our good example.

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  3. Yes, ever since I set it up, I have been striving to make my facebook page a pleasant place for people to visit. Lots of puppy pictures! The world can be such an ugly place and injustice must be addressed when we encounter it, but not always on facebook.

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  4. So glad you’re feeling better, Wendy! Prayers to Jehovah Rapha to continue the healing process.
    * On the thought that laughter is indeed the best medicine, a riddle – what was King David’s favourite food? (Answer is at the end of this comment.)
    * The barrage of personal vehemence is indeed tiring. I’ve had frienship thrown back in my face because of how I voted, and it did hurt. But I think we have to look beyond the anger, and if we do, we’ll find a deep well of frustration centered in the conviction that life SHOULD ‘go the way we want’.
    * Seen through that lens, the lashing-out is rather more like a fractious infant throwing his toys out of the pram and wailing. You’d rather he didn’t and you want to soothe him, but you know that only after the tantrum has run its course can your care be helpful. For the infant, an embrace will be welcomed again, in time. In the case of adults, one can only hope, and meanwhile pray.
    * Oh, and David’s favourite food? Psalami.

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    • I loved “Laughter is the Best Medicine.” That was the first place I turned in Reader’s Digest. Then “Humor in Uniform,” and the college campus one – can’t remember the title. I submitted a story to RD my senior year, but they chose not to run with it. I was sitting in the classroom, about five minutes before class began, and behind me, two young men were discussing the previous evening’s basketball game. One remarked to the other, “Well, I’m not saying the ref was blind, but if he’d had one more eye, he’d have been a cyclops.”

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    • Andrew, your words to look beyond the anger are hard to live out, but in the end, they’re the most effective, at least for our own spirits, if not for others. Much wisdom in your comment.

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  5. I hear John Lennon singing “Imagine there’s no Facebook…” I was just talking with Xochi Dixon a couple of weeks ago about our shared desire to hide our personal Facebook page and keep public the Author page. My poor wife was actually in tears about a month ago because she was so fed up with the endless stream of negativism, yet she did not want to block the individuals who were posting it. I felt a slight tinge of conviction as I read through your blog posting, because I fight hard against the vortex that is trying to suck me in. Usually I can fend it off, but sometimes I find myself responding to something that is best left alone! Thank you for the gentle reminder.

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  6. This is so true! We’ve all been suffering from outrage fatigue. It’s been hurtful to feel ostracized and demonized for our values, though most of my friends have to idea when they are slinging rocks that hurt because they don’t know how I feel politically. I’m thankful for the option to unfollow. While FB is great for protecting ourselves from people who sling rocks for fun, at the same time, all of this editing of our personal worlds to make it look like we feel is ultimately part of the problem. If only everyone had a little more Jesus!

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  9. Back in the day (ugh! I sound like my dad), when I was doing full-time ministry, I used Philippians 4:8 to comfort people attending the funeral of a loved one. Rather than remember unpleasant things, remember those things about the person that are true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, admirable, and excellent. That’s the best way to remember someone. Philippians 4:8 is great for checking our thought patterns in just about any environment or circumstance.

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  10. Beautiful post, Wendy. Phil 4:8 is a verse I’ve prayed daily for YEARS. It began when I realized how important it was to think on what is TRUE, not on what if’s. Yeah, I tend to go worst-case in my thoughts, long before anything has actually happened. God’s used this verse to transform my thinking.
    *I agree with the importance of posting “words of life” on social media. I tend not to post about political things or to share negative things about people. Rather, I prefer to ask questions that get them thinking about things that are challenging me. And, maybe even help peoples’ eyes point more toward Jesus.I like to share pictures that move me, in the hopes that they will move others as well.
    *Though I’m not published, I don’t think online arguing is productive. People will be swayed by graciousness before they’re swayed (in a positive direction) by vitriol.
    *I hope you are feeling better soon, Wendy! I’m getting over some sort of bug too, so I’ll pray for your healing/continued recovery today.

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  11. Feel better Wendy.

    I agree little has changed on Facebook. In fact I think it is worse at times. I keep looking for all that you mentioned in your post. I even try to practice it when I am posting. There are times when I am ready to get rid of Facebook but I have reconnected with and met numerous wonderful people through Facebook. Hopefully the good and wonderful reasons will prevail.

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  12. Dear Wendy, I’m sorry to hear you’ve not been well, and I’m glad you’re on the mend, as I’m sure it’s frustrating for you to be held back from your usual busy pace.
    I couldn’t agree more about avoiding discussing politics online. It’s a lose-lose conversation every time. By the way, it bothers me to see and hear Canadians taking jabs at our neighbour’s situation when we have more than enough stuff to clean out of our own noses. Nosy neighbours aren’t nice. 🙂
    Today on HopeStreamRadio, I blogged and did a podcast about the benefits of a Philippians 4:8 thought-life to our mental health. And as you’ve pointed out, it certainly won’t hurt our platform to focus on the lovely too.
    Healing blessings ~ Wendy Mac

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  13. I foolishly thought the outrage would end once the election was over. Now, it wearies me even more. It can be disheartening to think that this is the new normal. But thank you for breaking down Philippians 4:8 and infusing us with encouragement. We know where to go for hope and healing, don’t we? First, the Bible. Then, I think I’ll go find some kitten videos.

    Praying you feel better soon, Wendy.

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  14. Until I was 12, I lived in a world in which staying quiet and out of sight meant I was safe from being noticed. Stop laughing, I was a scared little mouse!
    I remember in 4th grade, being cast as The Sun in the class play about the Solar System, because I had a serious mane of RED hair. By the end of the 2nd rehearsal, I was a star. I don’t ever remember actually doing the play, because I think not showing up at rehearsal sent the clueless teacher a message.
    I am not and never will be an extrovert. I CRINGE at people who blat on and on all over social media about (insert cause here) and never seem to read the writing on the wall. The words that say “shhh, we’re all done!”
    I’m pretty sure that no one’s political leanings were swayed by angry posts on Facebook.
    One thing Canadians take pride in is out reputation for being nice. The thing is, everywhere I’ve been, whether in the US or South America, people are just as nice. People want to be kind, and love the kindness shown in return.
    But when angry people drop their gloves, they’re not interested in polite discourse. THAT is when I walk away.

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  16. I try to stay out of politics on the internet. I’ve always been blessed – or maybe I should say cursed – with the ability to see more than one side to everything. But the constant hostility is getting to me. All I can do is pray for peace on Earth, and, especially, in our country.

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  18. Wow! This older post was certainly prophetic for today. “Outrage fatigue” is a great name for it. I finally had to unfollow (not unfriend) a good number of the angriest people. It helped a lot! Phil. 4:8 has never been more needed than today!

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