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Agents Understand Rejection

June 20, 2014 //  by Rachel Kent//  57 Comments

Blogger: Rachel Kent

Last week I wrote about what to do when your query letter is rejected by agents. This week I’d like to remind you all that agents experience rejection, too. Each day we receive rejections from publishing houses for authors’ projects we’ve submitted. When I receive one of these rejections, I feel it. I’m disappointed and it’s hard to tell my clients that a publishing house has turned us down. While these books aren’t really my projects being rejected (I didn’t write them), they’re still important to me. I want to see those books in print. I love them–that’s why I chose to represent them. I want other readers to have a chance to read them too.

Agents also experience rejection when we’re negotiating contracts. Sometimes we present a change to the contracts department at a publishing house and we believe the change is mutually beneficial to the author and the publisher, but the contracts negotiator is immovable for one reason or another. When this happens, it’s frustrating and disappointing because we are unable to get what we want for our clients.

We’re also faced with rejection when we work on obtaining the best titles and cover art for our clients’ books. Most of the time covers and titles are presented to us and they are fabulous, but sometimes we would like to see them tweaked in one way or another. This isn’t usually a problem, and the changes are made, but once in a while the sales people (or some other in-house source) demand that a certain title or cover be used. Though we’re pretty sure that another design or title would have a broader appeal, we’re unable to convince the publishing house to make the change. This is disappointing, but it’s also a lesson in trust. We move forward, hoping that the publisher is right and that the final title and cover will sell more books.

So next time you receive a rejection letter from an agent, remember that we understand the feelings that you are experiencing. And if it’s your agent passing along a rejection, know that your agent feels the sting along with you.

What do you do when you receive a rejection letter?

How do you get past the negative feelings so that you can press on in your publishing journey?

 

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Category: Life, Writing Craft, Writing LifeTag: Agents, dealing with rejection, rejection letters

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  1. Cheryl Malandrinos

    June 20, 2014 at 5:26 am

    What a great reminder, Rachel. It is so easy to forget that agents experience rejection just like we do.

    I only allow myself one day of feeling grumpy or let down over a rejection. The next day, I’m pushing forward and working toward finding a new place for my submission or tackling a different project so I feel I am accomplishing something positive.

    Hope you have a great weekend.

    Reply
    • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

      June 20, 2014 at 8:29 am

      Good practice – giving yourself the chance to experience honest disappointment, without trying to wallpaper it, is important.

      So is having other writing projects underway; a rejection from a source on which you staked a lot can feel a little like a death, and a new story or article is a bit of new life.

      Reply
    • Christine Dorman

      June 20, 2014 at 12:19 pm

      Great attitude, Cheryl. 🙂

      Reply
    • Rachel Kent

      June 20, 2014 at 2:42 pm

      That’s a great attitude!

      Reply
  2. shelli littleton

    June 20, 2014 at 5:56 am

    Thank you for sharing that, Rachel.

    Rejection is never easy. It hurts the heart. But positive and negative feedback promotes improvement. And probably after crying my heart out to God, I am reminded of the Savior’s rejection. We aren’t alone. But we press on to accomplish His goal in us.

    Reply
    • shelli littleton

      June 20, 2014 at 6:01 am

      And Andrew, if you are reading today … we found four kittens yesterday that had been dumped out on the side of the road. We are enjoying caring for them. Thought of you.

      Reply
      • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

        June 20, 2014 at 6:39 am

        I’m here – thanks, Shelli!

        You made my morning.

      • Cynthia Herron

        June 20, 2014 at 7:45 am

        Ahh, Shelli…

        I’m tempted to drive down to your neck of the woods and take a peek at those kitties.

        What time is dinner? 🙂

      • shelli littleton

        June 20, 2014 at 8:34 am

        Oh, I wish, Cynthia! I put a picture up on Twitter and Facebook. They are darling. I don’t know what we’ll do with them. The girls want to keep them all, of course!

      • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

        June 20, 2014 at 3:11 pm

        Cats are wonderful to have around, and four?

        Good number!

        They keep rattlesnakes at bay, too. We see far fewer than our neighbors do, because the neighborhood ‘casual cats’ hang around our house.

  3. Jenny Leo

    June 20, 2014 at 6:08 am

    I’m with Cheryl. I feel the sting of disappointment, then climb right back on the proverbial horse. It helps to have multiple projects going at once, so a single manuscript isn’t bearing the weight of all my hopes. In tough cases I might pull out my “warm fuzzy file” of positive things people have said about my writing over the years.

    Reply
    • Jenni Brummett

      June 20, 2014 at 9:35 am

      The “warm fuzzy file” is a great idea, Jenny. I started one awhile back, but need to better maintain it.

      Reply
    • Jennifer Zarifeh Major

      June 20, 2014 at 10:18 am

      I have a “warm fuzzy file” too!!

      It really does help to remind ourselves that we are able to do more than we think, when we think we’re meh.

      Reply
    • Cheryl Malandrinos

      June 20, 2014 at 11:58 am

      I like that “warm fuzzy file” idea, Jenny. I might have to implement that here.

      Reply
    • Rachel Kent

      June 20, 2014 at 2:43 pm

      I love that idea! Everyone should keep a warm fuzzy file. 🙂

      Reply
  4. Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

    June 20, 2014 at 6:37 am

    After I finished school and started looking for a teaching job, I learned a lot about rejection. Three years’ worth.

    Usually rejection was by letter, but sometimes it was more personal – I had been overjoyed to be invited for an interview at SUNY-Buffalo, only to be told on arrival that they had their candidate, and that the other interviews were just to fill out the required numbers.

    The other interviews. It wasn’t about me; other people were going through rejection, too.

    That really turned it around for me. The whole world didn’t revolve around me, and thinking about others’ disappointments as I faced my own, made me see the whole process as a huge game of musical chairs, played in the dark. When the music stopped, the opening might be there, but with more people than chairs, it likely would not.

    But eventually I’d be sitting down. It was a statistical likelihood.

    That made it easier to accept rejection, and move on. But there was one more step.

    I had to separate who I was from what I did.

    I was an academic; now I write. But neither was or is who I am. If I lost my academic career – which happened – I wouldn’t be diminished as a person.

    If I never make it as a writer, I won’t have to hang myself in shame. It’s not me. It’s just what I do now.

    What I am is a unique individual whose salvation was purchased at huge cost by God-become man. I know a bit about pain that I would not wish on my worst enemy, and that helps me to appreciate that I have been profoundly and emphatically accepted.

    In the face of that, temporal rejection is pale indeed, and the disappointment it causes is fleeting.

    Reply
    • Jennifer Zarifeh Major

      June 20, 2014 at 7:03 am

      If I make it?

      If I have to fly down there and smuck your good arm (therefore diabling your weling skills) and make you keep going, I will. And I’ll bring reinforcements.

      So.

      There.

      Reply
      • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

        June 20, 2014 at 7:11 am

        Yes, well, point taken.

        I was merely pointing out the logic of apprehending the probability of publication from perusal of past and current statistical information, which obviously does not apply in this case.

        Better? Do I avoid intervention?

      • Jennifer Zarifeh Major

        June 20, 2014 at 7:29 am

        As if.

      • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

        June 20, 2014 at 7:49 am

        (Resigned tone)

        Well, come on down. The dogs’ll join in.

    • Jim Lupis

      June 20, 2014 at 7:05 am

      Beautifully expressed, Andrew. Isn’t it wonderful to know we are never rejected by Jesus, and that He sticks closer to us than a brother? And not anything can separate us from His love.

      Reply
      • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

        June 20, 2014 at 7:13 am

        Jim, yes, that’s exactly right. Our worth is defined in His eyes, and no one can ever take that from us.

        And perhaps just as important, no one and nothing can ever top it.

    • Cynthia Herron

      June 20, 2014 at 7:41 am

      Andrew, I think all of us within the B & S community would agree, you’ve enriched our lives tremendously! I look forward to your thought-provocative comments here almost as much as I do our agents’ posts.

      And what do you mean “…if I never make it as a writer…” ? You ARE a writer.

      Can’t wait to read your future books!

      Reply
      • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

        June 20, 2014 at 7:48 am

        Gosh, Cindy, reading your words, I must have got something in my eye.

        Computer screen’s all blurry.

      • Shelli Littleton

        June 20, 2014 at 7:49 am

        In agreement with Cynthia, you ARE a writer, Andrew.

      • Shirlee Abbott

        June 20, 2014 at 9:27 am

        Amen, and amen.

      • Jenni Brummett

        June 20, 2014 at 9:38 am

        Agreed, Cynthia.

    • Jennifer Zarifeh Major

      June 20, 2014 at 10:21 am

      See?

      SEE?!?!?!?

      Reply
      • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

        June 20, 2014 at 10:47 am

        Yes. I really do.

  5. rachel m

    June 20, 2014 at 6:46 am

    i have stopped thinking of these letters as rejections; more “passes.” they are passing on my project because it is a puzzle piece that is not currently fitting. in every “pass” i’ve received, i have received a good balance of constructive feedback and positive encouragement. i know this is not the case always in the industry as a whole, but it seems to be consistent with CBA editors. if you change the language you use, you can keep it from becoming personal. instead, it’s waiting for the right fit 🙂

    Reply
    • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

      June 20, 2014 at 8:26 am

      Exactly right. It’s not personal; it’s a business decision, or a decision based on current workload being too high.

      It’s important to remember that rejection is NOT necessarily an objective judgement of your work. It’s a reflection of many factors, most of which you’ll never know.

      Many authors went through multiple rejections on a manuscript before it found a home…after which it became a rip-roaring success.

      Reply
  6. Jim Lupis

    June 20, 2014 at 6:51 am

    Rejection make me think of D words.

    When I receive a rejection I become Disappointed, Disillusioned, and Discouraged.

    Then I Discover that the rejection was Deserved.

    So I become Determined to Develop a more Desirable manuscript that is so Delicious my new agent is Delirious.

    I then Drive Down to Dunkin Donuts to celebrate with a Double Dunkacino. 🙂

    Reply
    • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

      June 20, 2014 at 7:29 am

      On the other hand, the Dimwit who Denied you might have been Deluded and made a Dopey Decision, for which he will be Dunned.

      Reply
    • Cynthia Herron

      June 20, 2014 at 7:42 am

      Lol, Jim! 🙂

      Reply
    • Shelli Littleton

      June 20, 2014 at 7:48 am

      I’m with you on the Dunkin Donuts, Jim! My first article published was initially rejected. It centered on Christmas. I woke up in the middle of the night thinking “take out everything about Christmas.” Assuming the Holy Spirit was leading, I did and resubmitted it. The editor called and congratulated me on my persistence! Since it wasn’t centered around Christmas, it fit perfectly for another month’s issue!

      Reply
      • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

        June 20, 2014 at 7:53 am

        Interesting serendipity!

        When I started “Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart”, it was supposed to be a Christmas story…by the time it was done, it was a Valentine’s Day story.

        I’m still quite pleased with the thing. I did manage to clear my mind and listen to the Spirit as to where the story should go.

    • Rachel Kent

      June 20, 2014 at 2:45 pm

      I am right there with you at Dunkin Donuts! (If we had one anywhere near us, that is.)

      Reply
  7. Cynthia Herron

    June 20, 2014 at 7:51 am

    Rachel, loved your thoughts today!

    How do I stay encouraged?

    *Laughter
    *Chocolate (Seriously. It’s good for us! 😉 )
    *Strong, hot coffee
    *This blog community
    *God’s word
    *Post-it notes of affirmation

    Rejection’s never easy, but in the grand scheme of things, I’ve learned it’s all about God’s timing.

    Happy Friday!

    Reply
    • Meghan Carver

      June 20, 2014 at 7:55 am

      Definitely chocolate, Cynthia! 🙂

      Reply
    • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

      June 20, 2014 at 8:27 am

      Survivor the Dancing Rottweiler also helps, along with Denali the Happy Husky.

      Reply
    • Rachel Kent

      June 20, 2014 at 2:46 pm

      I love seeing this blog community on your list!

      Reply
  8. Jessica R. Patch

    June 20, 2014 at 9:09 am

    The other day in my Bible study, Beth Moore said (and I’m paraphrasing) that we see time as slipping away, leaving. But God’s kingdom and calendar never lose time. In His kingdom, we’re moving toward time. Time is coming (ultimately when the time comes and Christ is revealed to us and every eye sees). The time came for Mary to give birth. We see that a lot in the Bible. The time had come…That’s how I feel about rejection, I guess. I’m losing time, time isn’t running out. The time has just not come yet. I’m still running toward something and that gives me peace, hope, and motivation to keep going, even if it stings a little at first. 🙂

    Reply
    • Christine Dorman

      June 20, 2014 at 9:14 am

      Wonderful words and attitude, Jessica. Thank you for sharing this. 🙂

      Reply
      • Jessica R. Patch

        June 20, 2014 at 9:18 am

        Thanks, Christine. And I meant to say I’m NOT losing time. 🙂

    • Andrew Budek-Schmeisser

      June 20, 2014 at 9:41 am

      We may be rejected here, but nothing that works for God’s glory is every truly lost.

      He saves up our tears, and turns them into pearls that reflect the lights that bounce from the very foundations of Heaven.

      Reply
    • Rachel Kent

      June 20, 2014 at 2:47 pm

      Well put! Thanks, Jessica.

      That Beth sure is an encourager. I love her studies.

      Reply
  9. Shirlee Abbott

    June 20, 2014 at 9:29 am

    Rejection? I prefer to think of it as redirection.

    Reply
  10. Jennifer Zarifeh Major

    June 20, 2014 at 10:59 am

    There’s the rejection I received that said “This story sounds great but I wouldn’t know where to sell it.” I was a bit taken aback, because the person had been in the business a whole whack of time.
    I thanked the person and moved along. But it bugged me because I felt the person didn’t want to try. Granted, my subject matter may grate on some, so there is that.

    Fine…moving on.

    I didn’t want an agent who was “Ohhh, hey, yeah, Indians. Kewl. Oh, make sure they talk slow to white man and shoot many arrow.”

    I was ready to dig in and wait. I wanted, and prayed for, an agent who’d stop at nothing to bring the book to the right eyes, and who was passionate about the story.

    And thank God, He sent the exact woman for the job.

    But I had to go through a few rejections to get there. I had to do the work, and accept that what I thought was perfection was a slight notch higher than average, and to find and beat my A game.

    And hello!?!? Critique peeps are CRITICAL to surviving the train ride to crazy town!!

    Reply
    • Jenni Brummett

      June 20, 2014 at 2:56 pm

      Partnering with a great agent is a humbling reminder that we’re not guaranteed wild success, but having someone on our side who believes in our story and in us, is a mighty blessing.

      Couldn’t agree more about CP folk. 🙂

      Reply
  11. donnie nelson

    June 20, 2014 at 12:10 pm

    There are three (3) things I do when I get a rejection letter.

    1st Thing. I let the air out of the tires of the *Mail Ladies Vehicle. *Heather

    2nd Thing. I apologize to Heather for letting the air out of her tires.

    3rd. Thing. I hide in my dog house. ( It’s a federal offense to let the air out of the tires of a USPO Mail Vehicle.)

    . . . by this time, I’m so happy to be out of federal prison that a petty thing like a rejection letter, doesn’t phase me in the least.

    Reply
    • Rachel Kent

      June 20, 2014 at 2:48 pm

      🙂

      Reply
  12. Jennifer Smith

    June 20, 2014 at 12:33 pm

    Love these thoughts, Rachel! I enjoy getting an inside look at what agents — and others in the publishing world — go through.

    How do I stay encouraged? Determination — continuing to write. There’s no hope of success when you stop trying. Another source of encouragement is prayer. Since I feel my passion for writing came from God, prayer helps me focus on my purpose even after a rejection.

    Reply
    • Rachel Kent

      June 20, 2014 at 2:51 pm

      I find a lot of my ability to press on comes from prayer and Bible study. God directs our paths when we let him.

      Thanks so much for sharing!

      Reply
  13. Karin Gall

    June 20, 2014 at 12:58 pm

    You guys are great. I just quit my job to write full time and to try to get a memoir published. I too have a hard time with rejection. Nice to know I have company. Well, not nice but reassuring.

    Reply
    • Rachel Kent

      June 20, 2014 at 2:51 pm

      It’s nice to know you aren’t alone, isn’t it? 🙂

      Reply
  14. Karin Gall

    June 20, 2014 at 2:57 pm

    Yes, very much so.

    Reply
  15. Kristen Joy Wilks

    June 21, 2014 at 7:09 am

    Good to know we’re not alone. Though it is a wee bit discouraging to think about the fact that the rejection continues long after one has snagged an agent. Even after the book is published I imagine, as not every reader is going to like it.

    Reply

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