Blogger: Rachelle Gardner
When I decided to become a literary agent, I received advice from several wise people who knew what I was getting into. They told me it would be a steep learning curve, it would be challenging to build my business from the ground up, and that it would take a few years to start seeing results.
Numerous times over the last five-plus years I’ve felt challenged nearly to the breaking point. There have been moments I’ve wanted to give up. But something always made me think back to the beginning and all the great advice. Then I’d remind myself, “Oh yeah, they said it would be hard. I guess this is what hard feels like.” Realizing that things were progressing exactly as expected, I’d gather the strength to continue.
There are going to be times like this in your pursuit of publication. There will be times when the waiting is interminable. You’ve been advised again and again that the publishing business takes patience, and that’s true even after you have an agent, even after you have a publishing contract, even after you have books out. You’re going to freak out and think, “I am so SICK of waiting.” That’s when you should look back and remember how many times you were told this would take patience, and tell yourself, “Okay, this is it. This is where the patience comes in. I can do this.”
You’ve been told that the published-author life isn’t glamorous and in fact can get pretty stressful when you’re trying to write one book, while doing revisions on another, and maybe marketing another. And you might think, “This is CRAZY, how am I expected to do this?” That’s when you remember all the times you read on blogs that it would be difficult, and tell yourself, “Okay, this is what I signed up for. They said it would be difficult, and this is what difficult looks like. I can do this.”
Those hard moments, the ones when you wonder why you’re doing it, the moments when you think you want to give up… those are where the rubber meets the road. Those moments are when you prove to yourself who you are and what you’re made of. Those are the moments that separate the men from the boys, the writers from the wannabes. They are your moments of truth.
You never know what you’re made of until you’re tested. You don’t prove your commitment until the moment you don’t feel like you want to be committed. You don’t prove your stamina until you’re tired but still must go on. You don’t prove your strength until asked to lift something you think is too heavy.
When your moment of truth comes, remind yourself: They told me it would be hard. This is what hard feels like. I can do this.
Have you experienced those “testing” moments in your writing journey? How did you make it through?
Tweetables
“You never know what you’re made of until you’re tested.” Click to Tweet.
“You don’t prove your stamina until you’re tired but still must go on.” Click to Tweet.
“They told me it would be hard. This is what hard feels like. I can do it.” Click to Tweet.
Nikole Hahn
But it’s so worth it. Writing has grown me as a person. Even in the waiting I am in now, it’s been a blessed experience.
Jeanne T
Me too, Nikole. I’ve grown so much as a person since embarking on this journey.
Richard Mabry
Rachelle, Ah, you’re singing my song. Been there, still doing that, got the T-shirt but it no longer fits.
But, as I tell my kids when they complain about their own field of endeavor, “That’s why they call it work.” Thanks for the reminder.
Rachelle Gardner (@RachelleGardner)
Or like I said the other day, “If it were easy, anyone could do it.”
A Louise Robertson
Rachelle – it’s like you are hiding in my kitchen, I am in the process of completing book two, outlining book three and promoting book one! Your post got me right where I live. Thank you for the reminder that it’s all worth it. When I write I feel as though it’s the only time I am who I want to be. I could never give it up, but there are times when that seems like the easy way out.
Sue Harrison
Yes, thank you for the reminder, Rachelle!
I don’t have any sage advice to give here, although I’ve been a writer for a long time. Mostly, when I’m waiting, I embrace my inner brat. At least until God taps me on the shoulder and points me toward someone who has a much heavier load than mine.
Jeanne T
I’ve been known to embrace my inner brat too, Sue. 🙂
Norma Horton
You realize your entire blog can also be applied to motherhood, don’t you, Rachel?
: )
Cheryl Malandrinos
You’re right about that, Norma. 🙂
Meghan Carver
Definitely, Norma!
Rachelle Gardner (@RachelleGardner)
And life in general!
Kathryn Barker
Just what I was gonna say! Thanks for your encouraging words Rachelle.
I grew up with Southern depression-era parents…they didn’t expect anything to be easy…they didn’t quit, but accomplished so many of their goals…and they passed along that same attitude and gratitude to my siblings and myself. I am in awe of their lives and their influence. We’re seeing the impact they are having on great-granddchildren…an amazing legacy!
Father’s Day is almost here and I will always be grateful to have a father who led by example~ the way through a testing time or life in general is to keep on keeping on!
Kathryn Elliott
Amen! The teen years are going to land me in an institution!
Cheryl Malandrinos
Great post, Rachelle. This was more difficult for me to accept when I first started out than now. I knew I could write well, but I figured that would be enough to make my work attractive to a publisher/agent. But I discovered writing is so much more than that. Yes, it starts with good writing, but you have to write what readers want. While creativity is wonderful, you also have to treat your career as a business. You have to learn how to market yourself. You have to learn not to allow rejection to stop you from moving forward. But as others have said, it’s all worth it.
Larry
Or, one could describe it as a archaic process which has yet to catch up to the 21st century.
It reminds me of some of the fellows from my old neighborhood growing up, the fathers of my pals, who would bitterly argue about their blue-collar occupations, yet find some perverse pride in the drudgery of their work, deciding that said work differentiates them as “real men” compared to someone who, I suppose, didn’t spend half their paychecks and all their weekends and evenings at a bar, in the pursuit of being a “real man.”
Many of my good pals from those days have come to resemble their fathers themselves.
I suppose, in a way, writers are like that. Those who have to put up with the absurdity of the industry define themselves as being “real writers” (when, really, what does any of that have to do with ones’ actual writing ), and in turn, like crabs caught in a bucket, would rather drag each other down instead of lifting each other up.
That, I suppose, may explain much of the attitude in the industry towards the e-book movement.
Brant Osborn
I enjoyed your perspective. The beauracracy involved in this industry is a nightmare and anathema to the artistic spirit. I’m right on the cusp of self-publishing. You might have just tipped me in the right direction. The tools of distribution are no longer in the hands of the few.
Matt
Rachelle, thank you for this post. It was exactly what I needed this week.
Jeanne T
I love your continual can-do attitude. Thanks for the perspective reminder. When it gets hard—the waiting, for characters to reveal themselves, for contest finals, for responses from agents—it so good to remember that I was told this was part of the journey. It must mean I’m doing something right, even if that “something” is embracing the difficulty.
Meghan Carver
Great perspective, Jeanne, that embracing difficulty is also doing something right.
Lori Benton
I like times of waiting. I call them times of uninterrupted writing.
The other stuff though (the books in multi phases juggle) I’m there now, first time ever. Yes, it’s crazy. But since it took me well over 20 years to get here, I had plenty of warning from wise and experienced writer friends. It’s no surprise. I’m asking the Lord to give me a Caleb-like attitude. These challenges seem like giants. But with God all things are possible. With God, “They are bread for us.” Numbers 4:19
Lori Benton
Numbers 14:9! It’s early….
Jenni Brummett
Lori, I love the mention of uninterrupted writing time. Glass half full attitudes really help in this industry.
Meghan Carver
In those moments of testing, a rejection or a difficult comment from a contest judge, I try to look at it as adding another pound or two or ten in my weight training. I’m building my strength pound by pound.
When I impose strict deadlines on my WIP…I can do it.
When I hit send for a content entry…I can do it.
When I make sure to click Publish on my blog post, even if it’s just one minute before my due date…I can do it.
When I make the goal of learning Hootsuite to make social media easier…I can do it.
When I train my children to respect the writing time…I can do it.
When I pray for strength and wisdom and words…I can do it.
I’m sure many more moments of testing will come, but hopefully I’m preparing now. Thanks for a great post, Rachelle.
Jenni Brummett
I’m waving my pom poms from over here Meghan. Your perspective is refreshing.
Jeanne T
I’m with Jenni. Great perspective! I like the analogy of adding weight to my training.
Crystal @ Serving Joyfully
Just waving “hi” To my friend Meghan 🙂
Kathryn Elliott
Life truly is about the skid marks, isn’t it? Last year’s road-to-rubber moments snuck up and smacked the enthusiasm right out of me, but I put on my big girl pants and muddled through. A member of my writing group suggested submitting essays and articles to smaller publications to bolster confidence and sharpen skills while I plugged away at the someday-novel. The few tiny victories worked wonders for me as I wait, hope, & pray for the big day.
Marci Seither
There have been so many times I have been close to chucking the whole writing thing out the window…but, I know I am in good company. Wilson Rawls felt the same frustration to the point that he burned all of his manuscripts. His wife begged him to rewrite her favorite one, so he did. I can’t imagine a library that didn’t include “Where the Red Fern Grows”.
Having good friends and family who encourage us to keep going when we feel like throwing in the towel is so important. I know that if it hadn’t ben for the encouragement of others I wouldn’t be writing anymore. So thankful for the Lord who puts the desires in our heart and the people He weaves into our lives to give us strength for the journey.
Andrew Budek-Schmeisser
Testing moments? Yes, every day! None of it is straightforward, and there’s nothing glamorous about it.
However – it’s worth it, because I’ve reached people who said, “Hey – your book made a difference. I have a dad/son/brother/husband who came back from the War with PTSD, and now I know what it looks like from the inside.”
That is the motivation to keep going now.
Before I was published, motivation was tougher. I made it then by setting a word count for the WIP, and meeting it every day. Like running, or lifting weights. I realized that what I wrote didn’t matter – if it was gibberish it would soon be excised – but some of what I wrote in the most dejected moments was quite good. And the discipline carried the day.
Andrew Budek-Schmeisser
If I may add a side-comment, about doing hard things…
It can be addictive, and the pursuit becomes an end, and finally the end in itself. I deal with people, hobbyists, who build airplanes…and some never fly their creations. They sell them and build ‘something better’. And they look back on decades that could have been enjoyed more in the air than in the workshop.
There is an adage about it being better to aim high and miss the mark than to aim low and hit it.
I disagree, and think it’s a pernicious seed that has blighted many lives. A small, gentle victory should be savored for what it is, and can lead to other things. A splashy failure may blaze like a comet, but all you have in the end is ash, and a memory of a dream.
So maybe that’s it. Maybe I’ve learned to appreciate the small victories in writing, rather than bemoaning the fact that I’m not yet the next Richard Paul Evans.
Heather Day Gilbert
Love this, Andrew. It’s important not to bash from one project to the next, forgetting the victory of accomplishment along the way.
Lindsay Harrel
Yes, I’ve experienced those times every time I get a rejection or a poor contest result…or even when a scene I’m writing just isn’t working and I think, “Who do I think I am?! I can’t do this!”
But the cool thing is that I AM committed. So if I have one of those moments, I let myself step back, pray, and not think about it for 24 hours. Then I shake off any negative feelings and plunge back into the fray. Because, really, what other choice do I have but quitting? And to me, that isn’t a choice, at least right now. Hopefully not ever.
Heather Day Gilbert
Great perspective. It reminds me of when I took childbirth classes with a woman from (I think?) Russia. She wasn’t dreading birth because they’d been reared to know GIVING BIRTH IS HARD–so that’s what she expected. I think in America we tend to gloss over hardships, determined to win at all costs with a smile on our faces. But I do appreciate those who have gone through what I’m going through who are honest enough to say, “It’s not easy. You’ll experience some rejections and some depressing things. It might take years. But persistence will pay off.”
Thanks for keepin’ it real, Rachelle!
Robin Mizell
Absolute truth.
Julie Chittenden
I’ve had to remind myself that anything worth doing is going to be hard. And really, if it’s hard, you are doing it right. 🙂
Camille Eide
“You never know what you’re made of until you’re tested. You don’t prove your commitment until the moment you don’t feel like you want to be committed. You don’t prove your stamina until you’re tired but still must go on. You don’t prove your strength until asked to lift something you think is too heavy.”
lOVE this reminder, and thanks for the “look back & remember this is what you signed on for” reminder as well. I don’t worry any more about the waiting, I understand that’s the way it goes in the pub biz. My frustration is more often with my own progress in building skill. And you remind me that I don’t grow as a writer until I’m stretched. I’m also reminded that when I am weak, God can all the better be seen in me. Embracing weakness sort of sucks, but it’s part of being strong. Pressing on is the *only* way to get there. Seems a no-brainer, but we need reminded anyway…
And the only writer *guaranteed* to fail is the one who quits. 🙂
Thank you for the pep-talk, Rachelle, and for sharing out of your own difficulty.
Micky Wolf
Great post, Rachelle, and so very encouraging, along with all the other insight and wisdom shared here from fellow travelers. Thanks so much! Was quite timely for me today! 🙂
Felix Ooga
Thanks a lot. This is exactly what i needed, atleast now i can say that i have the motivation to keep going!
Sydney Avey
I’m always amazed by how closely my faith walk and my writing life track.
Andrea Cox
Whoever says life is easy hasn’t lived it. Thanks for the reality check, Rachelle!
Blessings,
Andrea
Sherry Kyle
Rachelle, you read my mind today. I was on my knees this morning, crying out to God to help me in this writing journey. It’s tough! Thanks for the encouragement that I’m not alone.
DDeLano
Thank you so much for posting this – it is exactly the message I needed to hear today. I have (finally!) gotten an agent, and I am in the editing stage before she sends it out to publishers – whenever it feels like I can’t stand the waiting anymore I am now going to try re-reading your post instead of eating a gallon of ice cream!!
Carolynnwith2Ns
I waited and worked hard to achieve what I have achieved. With my column in eight newspapers and 100,000 homes, with a small fan-base which still amazes me when I’m recognized, with the dream still strong, I falter some and get back up because getting up is what I do.
My aim was to accomplish what I am in the midst of and now that I am there, I continue to realize the possibility and reach. It’s tough, it’s hard, but when a stranger walks up to me and tells me they like my writing, my reach extends. I love it Rachel, I love it because it is what I am, a writer.
Now…I’m reaching for an agent. Goodyear anyone?
Carolynnwith2Ns
Rachelle I misspelled your name, something people have been doing to me my entire like. When they do it I feel as if they didn’t care enough to pay attention. Let me say, that certainly was not the case here. I apologize.
Heather Kopp
What a great post about marriage!
Jan Cline
I think I have finally reached the point where the hard times don’t set me back. It takes lots of rejections, redirections and attitude adjustments to mature into a thick skinned writer. I think you need to reach that point in any profession. You can look at challenges as mountains or molehills. Of course drowning yourself in chocolate until the wave of disappointment and aggravation passes always helps.
Crystal @ Serving Joyfully
“the publishing business takes patience, and that’s true even after you have an agent, even after you have a publishing contract, even after you have books out.”
This has been an eye-opener for me as I have been in writing groups with more established writers with many books out, etc… Getting an agent or even getting published isn’t the open door to guaranteed continued success.
Dan Miller
Rachelle,
I love this post. What I’ve observed is this: people with small goals have short timelines – employees tend to think in one week or one month segments. People with big goals always think in 3-5 year increments. As a writer I can tolerate the little bumps in the road because I keep my eye on the long term picture. A rejection or poor review today is overshadowed by the compound effect of years of being in the game.
Sue Holbrook
Every time I get into a real groove with my writing work, life hands me a smack-down. It’s a learning experience to realize that the people who are successful writers have plowed through the smack-downs and kept the one thing going that gives them validation. Life goes from challenge to challenge and it’s up to us how we define ourselves through the challenges. And a big part of our challenge as people…as writers…or anything else we do is to determine how we will respond and define ourselves through our challenges. It’s only taken 60+ years for me to learn this! And every day offers a new learning process. It’s hard…and that’s the story.
Mart Ramirez
Love this!! And so very true! I always remind myself nothing worth having is easy. Bookmarking this page for when I need a little pick me up later. Thank you, Rachelle!!
Grace Linde
Thanks Rachelle! This is a reminder I need everyday. I love your Tweetables. My day job is a fitness coach, so I can relate to the strength being tested when you lift something too heavy. It’s a great analogy to apply to my mind, heart, writing abilities, spirituality…just about every aspect of life!
Neil Larkins
The old-timers used to say it to me and now that I’m one of them I can say it. One more once: “If it was easy anyone could do it.” The joy is still gone, like I said in my last post, but no one promised me hard work would be joyful.
Dina Santorelli
I think I originally posted this in the wrong place, so here I go again:
As Tom Hanks’ character says in A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN: “It’s supposed to be hard. If it wasn’t hard, everyone would do it. The hard is what makes it great.” 🙂
Teresa Lockhart
And remember there’s no crying in baseball–and writing. Yeah, right. 🙂
Dennis Brooke
For me, getting through the tough parts involved getting personal assistance from an expert. Reading blogs (such as yours) and books, going to conferences, etc. is an excellent education. But sometimes you need personal guidance.
I reached a point early in my writing where I hired Jeff Gerke to do a review of my first ten pages and more recently Mick Silva a macro-edit of the entire manuscript. In both cases I got specific direction and encouragement that was well worth the cost.
People pay for personal trainers, classes, counseling etc. Sometimes the path forward in writing involves that personal coaching which requires a financial investment.
Margaret Piton
When I first started out as a writer, jobs on newspapers were plentiful. I ended up with a column in a major newspaper and all the freelance work I could handle.
Then came a long dry spell, which has not yet ended. However, I carry on, writing my blog avery other day, working on plays and novels, etc. Quitting is not an option.
Anne Marie
This is such a great post that I pinned it to two different boards! 🙂 Thanks, Rachelle!
God bless, Anne Marie 🙂
J. D. Bushroe
Thank you for your encouraging post, Rachelle. Last night I had one of those moments–I’ve been querying agents for the last 2 months (and receiving rejections) and finally came to the conclusion that my 1st chapter isn’t up to snuff. I felt like I’d just blown my chance at representation, and I had no idea how to fix my story because I was receiving conflicting feedback. But the solution came to me when I wasn’t thinking about it, and now your blog post arrived at the perfect time. Now I know to tell myself, “They said the querying process would be hard. This is what hard feels like.” There are more agents out there for me to query with my updated MS. I can do this! I WANT to do this!
Naomi
Awesome post, Rachelle. A powerful reminder for all us writers. This journey is a long one, with many difficult turns, but the rewards are worth every single step. 🙂
Elizabeth Kaiser
Good one, Rachelle! This definitely applies to writing, but also to every aspect of life. Growing up, career, marriage, parenting, being someone’s friend. It’s all got “rubber meets the road” points, where we get to decide “Are we dedicated to this, or just funning?” Sometimes the correct answer is one or the other, but by answering truthfully we will grow in strength, as well as understanding who we are, and what we actually WANT bad enough to suffer for.
Luke Abaffy
Great article Rachelle! Keep them coming.
Kent DuFault
Booyah! Rachelle Gardner always tells it like it is. That’s why she’s one of my favorite bloggers on the subject of writing and publishing.
Bruce Louis Dodson
It’s so much better now than it was 30 years ago when we sent hard copy with SASE, and waited and waited and often never heard back. E-mail has been a godsend!
Amber O'Shea
Waiting is the most difficult! So is the not knowing. I worry if my emails even get through. I met an editor online and she was ever so kind. I must have sent her upwards of 100 emails in both of her addresses and finally she only got the one. I wonder if that happens with others, if my emails aren’t being sent. It kills me 🙁
Daniel Acosta
I appreciate the importance of patience on the part of the writer who submits his work. What I don’t appreciate is not hearing back from those receiving my submissions that they were indde received. Too many times, after rather patient, long waiting periods, I asked for a stutus report on my submission only to be asked to resend it. i don’t expect these people to immediately read my submission–especially e-submission–but I think a simple received email is the professional thing to do.
Dan Erickson
It’s a constant test. If I stopped feeling tested, I’d worry that something was wrong.
Cynthia
Nothing worth doing comes easy.
Y.I. Washington
Rachelle, thank you so much for this reminder. I needed this today. This is the kick I needed to keep going.
We can do this.
Teresa Lockhart
All I can think to say is “ditto.” Apparently, members of my writing family I have yet to meet have been climbing the same mountain. I am not alone on this journey.