Blogger: Mary Keeley
I have read a few submissions lately in which the writer used a flashback in the first several chapters of their novel, and I thought maybe it’s time for a flashback refresher. Personally, I enjoy a great flashback in a story. But that’s the key point. What makes a flashback great?
Since a flashback scene is “old news” and lacks imminent action or tension, there must be compelling reasons for its presence because it interrupts the pace of the story. Two reasons are:
- It gives insight into a character’s current motivation and emotional state.
- It shows an event that happened years before the story begins, which is vitally important for the reader to know in order to fully understand the tension or mysterious circumstances of the current story.
Don’t shy away from using a flashback because you aren’t sure how to make it work. Done well, a flashback adds depth to a main character’s struggle and insight into his or her actions and emotional responses in the story. Strong reasons to include them. Here are tips for writing an effective flashback:
- Write it as a complete scene.
- It must be written in a way that keeps readers’ interest.
- Never use a flashback in the early chapters of your book, when you should be busy introducing the main characters and building the action. The resulting effect will be to confuse readers and interrupt the action before it has time to engage readers in the story.
- Insert a flashback after a powerful scene in the novel. It must directly impact the current action of the story.
- Give the time and place in which the flashback takes place in the first sentence. Readers who have to concentrate on trying to figure out where and when the flashback scene is taking place will become frustrated and may disengage from your current story and stop caring about your characters. If that happens, they might quit reading.
- Use correct verb tense for the entire flashback to clarify for readers when the flashback begins and ends.
- Wait to insert a flashback as long as possible, that is, until the critical moment when readers absolutely must have the backstory information before they can move ahead to follow the action. Leaving some mystery in the story keeps readers turning pages to get clues. They want to worry about the protagonist. The longer you hold off, the more readers will stay engaged in your novel. This explains why a flashback inserted in the first half of a book doesn’t work. If readers have all the answers too early, there is nothing to keep them interested.
Can you think of another compelling reason to use a flashback? Do you recall a book you read in which a flashback was used in a powerfully effective way? If you have used a flashback in your WIP, why might you need to rethink its construction or placement?
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Andrew Budek-Schmeisser
Interesting question for me, because the book I’m currently shopping has flashbacks almost out of the gate.
There is a reason – they develop a doomed relationship between the male lead and his late fiance, as told to a woman with whom he will later develop a romance. Their interaction in the ‘spaces’ between the flashbacks serves to make their later relationship believable from both a dramatic and emotional standpoint.
I could not think of any other way to do it, and still retain dramatic tension while keeping the second female lead ‘engaged’ through the whole story. It seems to have worked – my Beta readers are tough, and they were complimentary of both the device, and the story as a whole.
I think that what made it work was that the flashbacks were not backstory; they served as a point of contact between two characters in the ‘now’.
The best example of ‘conventional’ flashback of which I can think is Nevil Shute’s “In The Wet”…only they’re flashforwards, not flashbacks. Did I pique your interest?
Jennifer Zarifeh Major
“Complimentary”? You amaze me with your almost Canadian levels of self-deprecation!! That story still floats in my brain, and I read it last year.
That scene in question, when they’re chatting on the flight, right? Excellent use of flashbacks, old boy!
And I still recall the scene when they’re in the bunker, resting vividly in my head…oohhh, SUCH a good read!
You should send your Chief Beta the most up to date version so she can read it again. 😀 BTW, that was a hint, in case you hit yourself in the head with torch or something.
Andrew Budek-Schmeisser
Well, thank you, Chief Beta! I really, really appreciate that.
That you still remember it so vividly is perhaps the highest compliment that can be paid a writer. That lives in my heart, and animates my actions.
I will send the definitive version.
Thanks, Jennifer.
Mary Keeley
Yes, you piqued my interest, Andrew. There are rare exceptions to any rule. It sounds like your early flashback is well done and leaves room for plenty of ongoing mystery.
Nevil Shute used a flashforward scene in his prophetic “In the Wet” to show what the future world might look like. A flashback is used to give insight into a character’s actions and emotional responses in the present. Their functions are different, don’t you think?
Andrew Budek-Schmeisser
The functions are different, but “In The Wet” uses the flash-forwards to give the sense of a character who is influenced by his own past – and also the ‘memories’ of a “past which still may lie in his future”.
Think of it as ‘trains’ on parallel timelines, one of which is a bit ahead of the other. The character is on the slower train, but has knowledge of what’s happening – and has happened – on its partner, some ways ahead.
The character is influenced to be a better person, by these memories yet unborn, but he has a terrible climb ahead…and not much time.
Certainly “In The Wet” is not sci-fi alternate future stuff. It is a journey to the depths of a man’s heart, which shows the latent greatness and majesty in even the most humble among us.
Mary Keeley
This indeed intrigues me, Andrew.
Michelle Ule
And as a Nevil Shute fan, I have to say In the Wet is the most confusing of his books and one of the few we didn’t really like . . .
Corby Nichols
I was very peaked when I heard the term beta readers. Obviously you must be more famous than me since this is my first book.
Are there any resources for finding beta readers and also make sure I won’t be watching my work be published by someone else?
My mom is biased, even if I wrote something horrible she wouldn’t tell me.
Carol McAdams Moore
Mary, Thanks for these clear guidelines for using flashback! I haven’t tried flashback in my fiction WIP for tweens, but I think they would love it.
Mary Keeley
I think tweens would love flashback too, Carol. It could let them in a a little secret (don’t they all love that!) and keep them turning the pages.
Jennifer Zarifeh Major
Good morning,Mary! 🙂
I quite like a well placed flashback, but in my humble opinion (as opposed to my blatantly UN-humble opinions) they need to be used sparingly in order to maintain the effect of the tool.
I used one flashback in my MS, and it’s used to convey the depths of her suffering, and the distance from which he’s alienated himself from his. I use it to tie their grief and loss together in such a way that the point in time at which he remembers his own suffering becomes the point from which their relationship solidifies and moves forward.
Whew. That pretty much wipes out the rest of my day for stringing intelligent thoughts together.
Mary Keeley
Good morning, Jennifer. Absolutely, flashbacks need to be used sparingly and positioned at a critical moment. Your use of it justifies its interrupting the flow of the story.
You’re far too humble. You’re just getting started with intelligent thoughts for the day.
Jennifer Major
Thank you, Mary.
And I just realized I used two! But they have the same effect, which is to show the variation between what is and what was. Light and dark, etc.
Jeanne T
This is a great post, Mary. In the earliest versions of my first book, I had a flashback. It was well written. It was also in chapter one. Like I said, it was my FIRST book. 🙂
I haven’t used a flashback in my current ms. I do have the character tell another about a dark moment from the past, which I hope helps draw out emotion.
One book that I believe uses flashbacks well is, The Sweet By and By by Sara Evans and Rachel Hauck. There are a number of them, but they show so much about the main character and give the reader an understanding of why she is the way she is now. If that makes sense.
Mary Keeley
Dialogue is another way to give readers a glimpse into a character’s emotions. Not all stories need a flashback, but do you plan to use one later on in your novel, Jeanne?
Jeanne T
I don’t currently have a specific flashback in this current novel. But, I’m still revising it, so one might feel needful as I continue to massage the story. 🙂
Johnnie Alexander Donley
Mary, I “think” I know, but could you clarify the correct verb tense for a flashback? Thanks so much!
Mary Keeley
Johnnie, if your story is being told in present tense, your flashback should be in past tense. If your story is being told in past tense, your flashback should be in past perfect tense. Is that what you were thinking?
Johnnie Alexander Donley
Thanks for answering, Mary. I thought the flashback began in past perfect (for a novel written in past tense), then switched to past tense and ended in past perfect. Your post and reploy was helpful though now I have some revising to do 🙂 The Books and Such blog is in my top three “must read” writing blogs. Thanks again!
Johnnie Alexander Donley
*reply*
Mary Keeley
Johnnie, technically you are correct. If the story is in past tense and the flashback is a long scene, the first sentence of the flashback should be in past perfect tense, then switch to past tense (to avoid becoming too ponderous), as you said, until the last sentence, which should go back to past perfect tense.
Johnnie Alexander Donley
Whew! Not as much revising to do after all! Thanks again, Mary.
Meghan Carver
Mary, so many good points here! I love a good flashback when it adds layers to the characters and depth to the story. In my current WIP, I rely heavily on flashback, although the first isn’t until at least a quarter of the book in. Perhaps I need to move it, but the series of flashbacks throughout the story give the reader hints as to how the male and female lead came to be in their current situation so that when the heart monitor stops beeping, the reader checks her heart as well. (I hope!)
Mary Keeley
Meghan, it sounds like you are revealing only a little at a time in your progressive flashbacks, which is good. Like you said, it might be worthwhile to take another look at the first one and determine if it might work better to blend it in to a later flashback, keeping more of the mystery going a little longer. Just a thought.
Jill Kemerer
Thanks, Mary–it’s helpful to get flashback advice from an expert!
I’ve read books where they appear in every other chapter. Some worked, others didn’t. In the ones that didn’t, I felt as if I was reading two books–the before and after.
Anyway, this post helped me. Thanks!
Mary Keeley
You’re welcome, Jill. It sounds like the books you mentioned had large portions of backstory that detracted from the current story.
Cheryl Malandrinos
It looks like I’m in the minority, because I don’t often care for flashbacks. Maybe I just haven’t read enough great ones. This makes my question almost comical.
The first book I wrote–and the only novel length one–was actually an entire flashback. The prologue opens one year after the events that took place in the rest of the book. This was done for two reasons. The book is about three adult sisters who have been rivals since childhood and how the youngest sister’s illness brings them together. The first chapter is a Thanksgiving holiday scene filled with the sisters and their families, so I wanted the reader to be able to connect to the three sisters first before adding in their husbands and kids. The other reason is that the cemetery scene in the prologue coincides with a similar scene in the epilogue with the sisters, once again, by their mother’s gravesite.
I’m guessing it’s tough to say from the little I’ve stated, but would that be a horrible error on an author’s part?
Thanks for the tips on flashbacks, Mary. I don’t know if I’m using them effectively.
Mary Keeley
True, Cheryl, it’s hard to give a concrete response to your brief description, but I have several initial thoughts. First, the backstory IS your story. Second, I wonder if it would be better to eliminate the prologue, folding anything vital into the epilogue. What do you think?
Cheryl Malandrinos
Thanks for your comments, Mary. I think the epilogue idea will be better. My main concern was in introducing so many of the characters in the first chapter. I think it might need to be reworked so that only the three sisters are introduced in the opening chapter and the extended families come in afterwards.
Lindsay Harrel
Thanks for the refresher! It’s so interesting to see different authors use flashbacks differently. I love how Katie Ganshert used them in her novels. They are full scenes — shorter than her other scenes, and more like vignettes — and I believe are written in present tense, which differs from the rest of the book, which is written in past tense. They are particularly poignant scenes that show something about the main character and why she is the way she is. I found these particularly effective…and powerful.
Mary Keeley
You’re very welcome, Lindsay. I haven’t read Katie’s books yet, but they’re on my list.
Annalyse Knight
Jeez, it sure is nice when I read an article and can do a fist pimp when I get something right. I was worried about the flashback in the novel I currently signed with a publisher. My flashback scene is the second to the last chapter and done in a way where my male protagonist is finally explaining to the female protagonist why he’s had issues. The book is third person and his flashback is in first person as if he’s explaining the “incident” to her, though it’s written as if it’s happening. In my opinion, it not only heightens the ending with a major reveal, but it also brings conclusion to the story.
Thanks for the great article.
Mary Keeley
Congratulations on your publishing contract, Annalyse. And congratulations that you held off the flashback until so late in the story. Obviously, the publisher thought you succeeded in your intended purpose for it.
David A. Todd
To answer your question in a different way, and to have the temerity to criticize a writing icon, the flashbacks in John Grisham’s Calico Joe were so confusing I almost abandoned reading it. He went from the present to two different times in the past, those times being a couple of months apart. It was difficult to know which of those times he was flashing back to. And, there were multiple flashbacks, with the older one moving toward the later one. As much of the book was in the past as the present.
Mary Keeley
David, that’s a good example of what happens when following a flashback (or multiples) becomes too confusing and laborious to be enjoyable. What kept you from abandoning it?
David A. Todd
The fact that I had written my baseball book (which you saw chapters of), and was planning a sequel to, and so I figured I needed to stick it out and see how the experienced expert did it.
donnie nelson
I just had a flashback to an earlier blog you wrote a month ago and I noticed, yours was a perfect FB and you followed all your rules to a Tee.
Practice what you preach . . . I always say, well actually my dad said that a lot, he was a minister.
End Note: I remember one of his sermons had a flash back to an earlier time, no wait! All his sermons were a flash back to an earlier time.Never mind.
Mary Keeley
Your flashback is confusing me, Donnie. But I think I’m relieved to have passed the practice-what-you-preach test.
So your dad never preached on Revelation?
donnie nelson
Your bible knowledge is showing there. Yes, he spoke of revelations often but I kind of group Flash Forwards and Flash Backs in the same family so I do think I’m covered.
Lori Benton
I once read a book in which the flashbacks were told in present tense, while the rest of the story was told in past tense. I was enthralled. It gave the flashbacks such immediacy. I would never have thought to try such a thing.
heatherdaygilbert
Lori, I’m thinking this is Wildflowers from Winter by Katie Ganshert? Pretty sure she did that.
Mary Keeley
I’m guessing, along with Heather, that you are referring to Katie Ganshert’s books. Lindsay mentioned them earlier. I’m going to move them up on my reading short list. Katie obviously did the reverse-tense flashbacks effectively since three of you have commented about them in this one post.
heatherdaygilbert
Yes, I’ve read some posts by how Katie’s editor helped her figure out using the present in the flashbacks and past throughout the storyline (Katie can chime in if she’s reading this!). I think it’s so fun to play with POV and tense in a novel, and it can be quite refreshing to read something different.
Lori Benton
It’s one of the Russian sagas by Paullina Simons. Not sure if it’s the first (The Bronze Horseman) or the sequel. Or both.
Lori Benton
Sorry I can’t remember which. It’s been quite a few years since I read them, but that flashback technique made a huge impression. More so than the actual storyline did, apparently!
Elaine Faber
In my novel, Black Cat’s Legacy, all the flashbacks throughout the book are from the Cat, as he, a POV character, recalls his ancestor’s memories of the actual 25-years-ago murder. Through the memories, the cat’s clues then help the protagonist search for the killer. At the end, the cat’s flashback reveals to the reader, the real killer , a secret kept from the characters. (you have to have a devious mind to come up with this stuff…)
Mary Keeley
A fun concept, Elaine. Your description reminds me of a Murder She Wrote kind of mystery.
Andrew Budek-Schmeisser
This post and the comments it drew have inspired me, and helped jell an idea I’ve been working around for my next story.
It’s a love story told in flashback, and a faith story told in the present, linked through two disparate elements…the fall of Saigon, and the Book of Ruth.
Got a good start on it this morning – looking at 3k words today.
For that, Mary, I thank you. You provided the key which opened this door.
Mary Keeley
Your next story sounds wonderfully complex, Andrew. I’m glad the combined comments triggered your inspiration. Three thousand words…sounds like an explosion of inspiration.
heatherdaygilbert
I’ve read some books where the flashbacks’ tense isn’t clear and I’ve gotten lost. But done correctly, flashbacks can take you back in time and give you vital pieces of info.
I did use a flashback prologue for my Viking novel, and will probably do that in my second one, as well. Since my MC is quite repressed, she hasn’t even worked through that defining event of her childhood. But I felt it was necessary that readers knew exactly where she’s coming from and what memory is driving her abandonment issues. I love the psychological drama a flashback can provide.
And I had some good advice once, that the flashback should always be moving the storyline forward. When it stops doing that and stops being relevant to the main characters today, it doesn’t need to be in there.
Mary Keeley
“…the flashback should always be moving the storyline forward. When it stops doing that and stops being relevant to the main characters today, it doesn’t need to be in there.” Absolutely, Heather. Thanks for sharing. I should have listed this as bullet point.
heatherdaygilbert
*blushing*–Thank you, Mary. It was actually my previous agent/editor who said that, when I was asking him about how many flashbacks were too many. Definitely helped me cut some out ruthlessly.
Emily Rachelle
I haven’t read all the comments, so this may be a repeat question, but I use dreams in my books – and one book starts with one. My freelance editor loves it, but I was wondering, would you consider doing a post similar to this one on the pros/cons/how-tos on dreams in books?
Belinda Y. Hughes
My NaNo WIP this year is based on the romance Getting Rid of Bradley, by Jennifer Crusie (Harlequin). It was her second novel, actually. She uses flashbacks to trickle in details. I forget at the moment how quickly the FBs show up, but they work well.
Jan Hurst-Nicholson
Thanks for the useful info. I rarely use flashbacks in my novels. However, I’ve broken your rule and used one in the first chapter of my WIP.
My MC – a man – is the newly appointed Head Teacher of an all-girls school and the story begins at a critical point on the first day of term when he introduces himself to the stunned girls at assembly. The first half of the chapter shows him explaining to the girls how things are going to change under his Headship, and their reaction.
The second half of the chapter flashes back to the previous week when he introduced himself to the all-female staff, and it shows their very different reactions to his appointment. It also gives me the opportunity to introduce the staff. The flashback is shown through the eyes of the school secretary and as she returns to the present she is observing the changes already taking place with the teachers – in the way they are dressed, and make-up has been more diligently applied.
I feel the story works better this way – but I stand to be corrected.
Julie Bates
Flashbacks need to be used carefully and with a light hand. Too many times they can confuse the reader and send the action to a screeching halt. That said, they can add depth to character and provide motivation to actions otherwise incomprehensible. I would only do it once or twice at most and not at the very beginning. Character needs to be established first and setting.
Debra
I am toying wit the idea of a flashback or two in my WIP. It makes sense that they can be used after the midpoint, so as not to give too much away early on. However, if the flashback totally gives away who the killer is, will readers think it’s a red herring and be upset when it wasn’t-that it really did show the motivation for the killer to kill? I’m new to mystery and appreciate all the advice I can get!
Jan Hurst-Nicholson
I have used a flashback as the second chapter of my latest book for several reasons. I believe the first chapter – first sentence even, should start where the action begins. A girls’ school has a new head teacher – and it’s a man. The first chapter starts on the first day of term when he introduces himself to the girls at morning assembly. We get to know him, and hear how he is going to change things, and we also get to see some of the reaction from the girls. The readers get to know him at the same time as the girls.
The second chapter is a flashback to the staff meeting the previous week explaining how he got the job, and how each of the female teachers initially reacted to the news. Chapter three returns to the present.
I do a similar flashback in the final chapter when the new term begins and we learn he has left. I then have a flashback to his final day at the school explaining why he left, and then briefly return to the present. I feel the book works better this way.
Darnell Reid
I’m a struggling writer. I self-publish and has a website at Godaddy. It is http://www.tweetybyrd.us. My stories are there. I need to have an agent so I can move on with my career. I hope that you can help me with an agent. My email is down below. Hopefully, they will take me on with hoping I can make some money to pay them. Thank you.
stephanie
I am currently writing a novel in which the protagonist is trapped in a dark room, talking to herself. I want the captor to remain a mystery, and the only clues to find out who it is can be found in her memories. Im one chapter in on my first draft so far and i am looking for pointers on when to insert the first flashback. I have a very complex storyline in mind but i want to be careful with its execution…
Andrew Budek-Schmeisser
Stephanie, I’m no expert, but I’ve been told that putting in flashbacks before the halfway point should be done with extreme caution, because they can make things confusing. (I learned this by experience, and had a major rewrite of a story that I could follow – after all, I wrote it – but left others scratching their heads)
* There are exceptions – Nevil Shute’s “In The Wet” is a good example. However:
1) The main storyline in “In The Wet” IS the flashback, and the present-day scenes serve as bookends – they’re not filler, though. They are vital to the storyline, bringing introducing character contrast in the beginning and bringing the arc to its closing fruition, and this brings me to:
2) Shute was in a class by himself as a storyteller, and “In The Wet” was a mid-to-late career piece. The structure of his early novels was more conventional, and he developed the skills to build a more complex structural framework over a long career.
* Please understand that these are in no way professional opinions. I’m very much an amateur, and the above is based on what I have been told by professionals, and some observations that I – hesitantly – put forward myself.
BSDAFO
THHE VLOG SUCKS
Wanyellah Arthur
Thakns for making me understand
Dr. Peg Daniels
Can a chapter end on a flashback without returning to the present? My last chapter (in a short story, but I’m hoping I can get a reply anyway, since I can’t find this information anywhere) is *significantly* longer than the others, because an extremely important flashback takes up half of it (the flashback: Lucifer, as Samael, leading his rebellion against God, whereas the rest of the story is Lucifer in present-day). I need to start the chapter in present time, and then after ten shortish paragraphs I transition to the flashback. After the flashback–after he’s swatted out of Heaven by the Power of God and falls, burning, screaming, terror-filled–I transition back to the present. Personally, I think it works better to keep the chapter as one unit, but my critique partner said to split it up. I could cut off the chapter with the falling, burning, screaming, and start the next chapter with the transition I have:
Samael’s screams. They ripped through his mind. Abruptly, as if yanked by a rope, Lucifer came back to himself. But the world still rang with those terrified, tortured cries, for they were tearing out his throat, endless, endless, endless screams. He found himself kneeling atop the L.A. beach’s jagged black boulder, his hands—grotesque hands, the skin too red, too thick, too shiny, patches of it raised like fire-crackled continents—making frantic swipes over the rock’s streaks of red quartz. As if to wipe away his blood.
As if to wipe away his Fall.
Any advice? Thanks!