Blogger: Rachelle Gardner
Rejection is part of the process of pursuing publishing, and I had to give my share of it at the Orange County writers’ conference a couple of weeks ago. But lest you think rejection ends once you get through the query stage… just wait till you have a published book! When the readers get ahold of it and start leaving their comments on Amazon, you could be in for a few surprises. To show you what I mean, here are a few Amazon reader-reviews.*
To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
“I don’t see why this book is so fabulous. I would give it a zero. I find no point in writing a book about segregation, there’s no way of making it into an enjoyable book. And yes I am totally against segregation.”
The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
“While the story did have a great moral to go along with it, it was about dirt! Dirt and migrating. Dirt and migrating and more dirt.”
The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
“It grieves me deeply that we Americans should take as our classic a book that is no more than a lengthy description of the doings of fops.”
The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis
“I bought these books to have something nice to read to my grandkids. I had to stop, however, because the books are nothing more than advertisements for “Turkish Delight,” a candy popular in the U.K. The whole point of buying books for my grandkids was to give them a break from advertising, and here (throughout) are ads for this “Turkish Delight”! How much money is this Mr. Lewis getting from the Cadbury’s chocolate company anyway? This man must be laughing to the bank.”
Lord of the Flies by William Golding
“I am obsessed with Survivor, so I thought it would be fun. WRONG!!! It is incredibly boring and disgusting. I was very much disturbed when I found young children killing each other. I think that anyone with a conscience would agree with me.”
The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien
“The book is not readable because of the overuse of adverbs.”
Mrs. Dalloway by Virginia Woolf
“The only good thing to say about this ‘literary’ drivel is that the person responsible, Virginia Woolf, has been dead for quite some time now. Let us pray to God she stays that way.”
And finally, EXACTLY what you want to hear from someone who is going to review your book:
Tropic of Cancer by Henry Miller
“This book is one of the worst books I have ever read. I got to about page 3-4.”
See? The “rejection” never ends… better get used to it.
How are you dealing with rejection? Do you have any good rejection or criticism stories for us?
* Compiled on http://www.themorningnews.org/
Amazon reviews are not to be trusted. Rejection is part of life. There’s an old song by The Second Chapter of Acts that has a line, “Nobody can take my life away, because I gave my life to You.” The same goes for rejection. Nobody can take my worth away because I gave my life to God and he holds life and worth and all things safe. My writing is given to Him and it’s only His approval I need. Sure, rejection stings for a moment, but then I remember that it doesn’t really matter.
Great attidude, Diana!
Amen!
I love your comment. While writing my novel, I often said that if nobody likes this, the power of creating is worth the write. On the other hand, I’ll accept a bonifide offer.
What encouragement that is! Not every book is a match for every reader. So move on. Multiple factors on the reader’s end go into the experience of a book–personal stress, rushed reading, comparison to the last book. Authors can’t control any of these factors, so we have to not take it personally when we get a review like these.
I resonate with the idea that we shouldn’t waste energy stressing over things we can’t control. “Move on” as you say.
One reviewer strongly criticized Four Letter Words [non-fiction, apologetics] for my statement, “Some things are true, some things are false.” That had to be false, she argued, because everything is just an opinion.
Can you say Irony?
The nice thing is this: though she really wanted to hate my book, she confessed, she couldn’t. Too well written, too kind hearted, too logical to hate. Whew!
Such a good post. Those first negative reviews really sting. I’m tempted to argue back and try to correct them, but that would only make matters worse. Gotta shake it off and keep writing.
Gotta shake it off and keep writing….very aptly put! this post has given a gr8 boost to my sagging morale after the initial rejections of my manuscript…
That reviewer’s comment was funny! You can’t win them all, that’s for sure.
Oh these are unreal! Where do I begin? CS Lewis, yeah, he made a whack of change selling Turkish Delight. Which is NOT chocolate!! And yes, Clive is at the bank right now.
I once worked as a picture framer. Our favourites were the self appointed critics who asked “Does, like, Ansel(Andrew, Aaron, Arthur) Adams ever do anything in colour?” The BEST was “Did Ansel Adams take , like, every picture in Yos-sah-mite Park? And where is that? Is that in, like, the States?”
Knobs.
Sadly, my worst rejection has come from my own mother. Don’t worry, she will NEVER see this. Trust me. Nor will she see her name on the “I owe much thanks to…” page.
She told me that I need grammatical help(umm, hello, grammar check?), that I confuse the reader with the back and forth time period changes. Which is understandable, you know, since EVERY chapter has the date and exact location at the beginning. And that my prose is too thick, far too many adjectives. That ALL dialogue MUST BE WRITTEN IN THE VERNACULAR. Which is odd, since I read here that dragging the reader through pages of vernacular is cumbersome and annoying. And a kill shot for the book.
And ummm, that whole vernacular accuracy thing? How would I do that IN NAVAJO???? Which only Navajo people and a very, very tiny percentage of the rest of the world can read???
GAH!
It’s called “he’s speaking Navajo, but oh look, there’s subtitles”.
Mama? No soy feliz.
Hmm, this is going to take longer than an hour on the couch and solitary chorus of “mmm hmmm” coming from the bespeckled, argyled guy in the leather chair.
Oh, I have a friend who speaks Navajo! I know, you can write the book that way, then hire him out to everyone. It’ll be a win-win! Or not, since I’m betting people won’t pay for both.
Ah, mothers, our best and worst critics. They’re a great training ground for what Rachelle is saying here. They tell us we’re wonderful or horrible. Just like all reviews, it should with a grain of salt (unless your mom is in publising, I’m guessing not, LOL!).
My mom is a classic Tiger Mother, in this ONE area, everything else, she’s total kitten! Seriously!!! That’s what makes it so bizarre.
I write psychologically twisted porn. My books definitely are not for everyone so I make one book free and allow generous samples of the others. Even so, reader ratings of my books on Barnes and Noble are uniformly distributed (as many one stars as five stars). Why do people download the books if they can read the first 20% and see that they don’t like it? But there’s no downside to being reviewed. The good reviews are gratifying; the critical reviews are instructive; and the silly reviews give me a laugh.
Good strategy to offer plenty of free content so readers know what they’re getting! I think this should apply to many kinds of books.
I hate when people leave “reviews” on amazon that aren’t about the book, or when they haven’t actually given it a chance, but my biggest pet peeve is when THEY DON’T ACTUALLY READ IT. there were some reviews I read a while back by some people who said something along the lines of “I haven’t actually read this book, but i heard bla bla bla…” and I’m like “okay, not a review. post about this in the comments, or in a discussion board post or something, but don’t try to sound like you know what you’re talking about when you don’t.”
Unfortunately that’s all too common. If you only read the first couple of pages, or if you never even cracked the book, why waste your time “reviewing” it? Doesn’t make sense.
Those comments only multiply when there’s a movie out. Then you have people who write a “review” based on what they’ve heard of the book, while others write a “review” based on what they heard of the movie. Or they watch the movie and write a “review” of the book, assuming they’re the same. That’s when it really bugs me.
I recently published my first book, only one guy so far said he wasn’t impressed but i was prepared 4 any ”rejection” or criticism. I’d read other authors’ experiences on rejection, so, i aint ganno take it personal, every book has its readers.
Some of the reviews of the classics had me laughing.Oh my. It’s good to remember that even excellent authors get dinged in reviews. Remembering that reviews don’t make the person helps me. Thanks for sharing these today, Rachelle.
I thought they were hilarious, too.
I have a book releasing in April of next year. I’ve already determined to have a good friend filter the reviews. That way I only see the beneficial ones (both good and bad). I think there is a lot to be learned from the constructive criticism in some reviews. Not so much from insulting ones.
While I’m not always the biggest fan of classic books, some of these had me laughing aloud. “dirt, migration and more dirt.” “Advertising for turkish delight”? Really people? Really? At least most people know how to spot a horrible review from a mile off.
Those two cracked me up, too. Talk about missing the point….. 🙂
I’ve come to dread the times when my publisher offers one of my books as a free e-book download. I know that immediately afterward I’ll see a spate of reviews on Amazon, not criticizing the book but decrying the “plot” to insinuate Christianity into the minds of unsuspecting readers. Get real, folks. If you don’t like the writing, that’s your opinion. If you don’t like the subject, delete the book–you paid nothing for it! The only “plot” is to get people to buy other books by the same author.
Sorry. My blood pressure is coming down now, I no longer see spots before my eyes. I’ll be okay.
I cherish legitimate reviews, both good and bad, and try to learn from them all. Thanks for sharing these with us.
I sent one of my clients’ books to a reviewer, and she complained and refused to review it because it was Christian fiction. Though the genre was listed as international thriller, the book’s description had martyr in it and the series was titled the Extreme Devotion series. I really thought it was obviously Christian fiction. I am sure to be clear now.
A few years ago, before I was ready I sent a manuscript to a well respected agent. A few weeks later I received a rejection.
Naturally, I was discouraged, but the agent took time to give me some specific advice on getting the craft help I needed at My Book Therapy. That was the greatest rejection blessing I could have had.
With this advice I learned a ton and now am delighted to be on their staff. This never would have happened without that rejection.
This rejection positive took a few years to formulate. Rejection is merely a stepping stone to what else God has planned as long as you remember to keep stepping forward.
Very true, thank you.
Michelle, I love the thought about rejection “merely being a stepping stone to what else God has planned as long as you keep stepping forward.” Well stated.
I suppose it’s comforting to know that even the classics have critics. I mean, it’s just a fact of life that we can’t please everyone–and that applies to books too. Taste in reading is so subjective. An author has to grow a thick skin. Or at least have a vast supply of chocolate to deal with bad reviews. 😉
Almost lost bladder control at the Lord of the Flies hater! I’m pretty sure CBS didn’t get their Survivor inspiration from William Golding – hysterical. My son is addicted to Deadliest Catch – maybe I’ll pick up a copy of Moby Dick for his summer reading?
Great idea! The differences between even the methods of powering the ships would be enough to draw him in.
The Grapes of Wrath review seems to be intended as a joke (and did get me laughing), yet the “Gatsby” one is pretty defensible. Sure, one can point to the beauty of the prose, but when the plot is pretty much what one sees on “The Real Housewives of….” reality television series (the “problems” of the wealthy and their amoral lives), and when it is pretty hard to deny that Daisy is a proto-Kardashian, one has to wonder if the state of our popular culture is because it has truly gone that far down, or simply appears so because there is no one with the talent to give it an artistic veneer.
(Conversely, you know your book is good when it is worthy of mustering criticism towards, and can be used as the center of discussion, dialogue, and debate).
Larry, I love Great Gatsby because it’s the unsaved world getting everything they thought would make them happy–and then realizing it doesn’t! To me, it’s a pretty honest book about life. What is it that truly makes us happy? And it’s sad that they don’t know.
To me, it’s a book that opens up great conversations. Why aren’t they happy? What does fulfill us? Have you heard of God? Let me tell you. 🙂
Of course, I want to write Gatsbyish fiction with a Biblical worldview. I want to write about the damage we do to ourselves–without making my readers roll around in the world’s filth. And I want to bring in the hope God gives, the answers and fulfillment that make life worth living and complete.
I agree 100% with it being an honest portrayal of the emptiness inherent with the pursuit of material wealth being “The American Dream.” [You mentioned how you want to write Gatsbyish fiction, and I applaud you for doing so; as I said, it is interesting to see if the common perception of popular culture as being worse than ever is simply due to there being no one to either give it an artistic veneer, or to portray it openly without the glam and airbrushing of modern marketing, and if you succeed in the latter you will be doing us all a great service. It would be interesting for there to be more voices describing what a Christian “American Dream” includes]. And I suppose that to show the just how shallow such pursuits are Fitzgerald had to show his characters as vapid. But all of that is something Henry James could write with one sentence, and avoid giving us readers page after page of the dreary decadence of the characters in the novel. (So by this I am measuring the greatness of the book by, I will admit, a mix of my asthetic tastes and also the common sense of “don’t use ten words to say what you can with five,” the irony not lost on me that this is a pretty lengthy post 🙂 )
Furthermore, I will add that Fitzgeralds’ short fiction seems to achieve this: so it seems that there is much to “The Great Gatsby” that is filler, and thus detracts from its greatness.
Rachelle, I thought a good bit about this with Becky Wade’s new release. There are a number of people who didn’t care for some things she included and gave her poor reviews for it. But I wonder if sometimes that can help.
When I look at Amazon reviews, I always look at the lowest ones first. If they all say, “This book was terribly written. Don’t read it,” then I assume they all know what they’re talking about. And I’m talking about more than a handful of reviews.
If it’s clear they haven’t read the book or it’s their preference or they’re being nit-picky, I ignore it. That’s just their take.
But I wonder if, in a situation like Becky’s, where the reviewers said, “I didn’t like some of the language she used. Not swear words, and yes, things a lot of Christians say, but stuff I don’t want to see in Christian fiction,” I wonder if that actually helps her target audience find her faster.
It’s kind of like James Rubart’s book Rooms when it was free on Kindle and so many complained in their reviews that it was a Christian book. A Christian might look at those one-star reviews and say, “Christian fiction? Great. Just what I want.”
Maybe I’m a little off topic here, but all this has helped me as I’m working on my book. I know some people won’t like my type of writing. And I’m starting to nail down why. And those reasons all make me feel better about why I’m writing. I’m not writing for everyone. I’m sure someday the wrong reader will get my book and blast me for it. That’s okay. Something they say might help the right reader find me.
Now off to read The Great Gatsby. Again! 😀
I love it when there are negative reviews of books I’m considering buying on Kindle, for this exact reason I don’t look at reviews in general unless I’m questioning the ‘cleanliness’ or ‘religious’ aspect of a book – I read non-Christian books, but I like to avoid books that are specifically other religions, like Mormon. I just don’t like to read them. So when I’m unsure as to whether a book is clean or faith-specific, I go to the lowest reviews available. There’s almost always somebody complaining, either about it not being clean/Christion (I don’t buy) or it being ‘too preachy/Christian’ (I buy now!)
Thank you, Rachelle. These reviews really help to keep reviews and critiques in perspective. While I try to listen to all feedback on my work for the kernel of truth in it that I can learn from, it’s also important to balance that with not taking everything to heart. (I’m much better at the former than the latter).
The most recent criticism story I have happened last week. I shared with my critique group a humorous short story that I’m planning to send out soon to magazines. We read our writing out loud to the group. The story that I shared had a first person narrator, an adult who recalls the time, at age seven, when told his annoying little sister to get lost and…she did. As soon as I finished reading the story, one person said, “That’s great. Your narrator stayed in character all the way through.” Immediately, another person in the group said, “Your voice is inconsistent. If you’re going to write a children’s story, you shouldn’t use words such as ‘acquiesced.'” The first person argued back that since my narrator was an adult, the vocabulary was perfectly acceptable. The second person argued back that since it was a “flashback” (which I don’t actually agree with), to childhood, the vocabulary was inappropriate. Other members of the group began to chime in, taking sides, debating each other and, I think, forgetting that I was even there. Eventually, they moved on to the next reader.
So I went home feeling that I had been blown about by a storm, not sure what to do with feedback that was completely contradictory. When my muddled feelings finally calmed down, I mentally reviewed what had been said and was able to pull out some helpful advice from both sides of the argument. With these in mind, I revised the story and I think it has become stronger as a result.
I think they were playing “dueling points of profound thought” and yes, you were in the way. At least you made lemonade, right? I’m sorry they ruffled your feathers.
Thanks Jennifer.
Thank you for this. I laughed at some, agreed with others and thought “that person’s nuts!” on several. I mean really. To Kill a Mockingbird is one of my favorites. I guess it really is a matter of taste :o)!
It took courage to send my children’s books series of 3 to the reviewers and then it waited in line.
When the reviews finally came out, it was clear that the reviewers understood and liked the second book (of the series), pointed out a dislike in the third book and were very much against the first book. Of course all I did was fixate on the negatives.
Over time I’ve accustomed myself to the fact that not everyone will like the books (yeh, it took time). The tough part is not incorporating other’s negative thoughts into my thoughts.
Thanks for the article…it was hilarious!
Very funny reviews.
Rejection that carries feedback never bothers me because I either agree with it, in which case I’m thankful the person pointed out what needs to be changed, or I disagree with it, in which case I’m thankful I found out that the agent/editor and I wouldn’t work well together because we don’t look at literature the same way, or we don’t share a sense of humor or worldview.
My latest funny criticism story was for a book wherein an old woman warned a young boy of danger. The boy remembered her words later but shook them off. He didn’t believe in old wives’ tales. One critique partner thought I needed to say “he didn’t believe in the old woman’s tale,” because the reader didn’t know she was a wife. I’d never said she was married.
OK then.
Oh my. One would hope that a crit partner would have a more extensive vocabulary?
Some of those reviews were pretty funny, Rachelle. I think the main problem is you tend to focus on the bad ones, no matter how many good ones you get. It’s kind of like having a fabulous time at Disney World, but receiving bad service in one restaurant. You come home and everyone asks how your trip was, and the first thing that comes to mind is that awful waiter (not that this happened to us).
I do my best to not worry too much about reviews. I read a hundred or more books a year. I don’t always agree with the reviewers who give a book 4 or 5 stars. We all come to reading with our own set of beliefs and backgrounds, which impact how a book touches us.
Hilarious. I find myself suddenly craving Turkish Delight…
I have to say I do agree with the reviewer about Lord of the Flies. I hated that book.
I must confess. I didn’t like some of those books either. *ducks rotten tomatoes*
I’m sure not everyone will like my books. After all, I’m getting rejection letters, so that extrapolation isn’t difficult. I like the idea of dancing to the good reviews, learning from the bad ones, and moving forward.
I once had a workshop critique where the faculty member rejected my work wholly on the basis of a disgusting PEDOPHILIC relationship between too characters. He was truly outraged. So was I. The relationship in question was between a twenty-one year old woman and a forty year old man. The relationship was a bit May-December, possibly unwise, but there is no jurisdiction where that relationship would be considered unlawful or amoral.
He was unhappy because he apparently considered me a shameless pornographer – which I am not. I was upset because I have no tolerance of child abuse in any form and I resented being so labeled. I was also unhappy because I had paid good money for the critique and this was the only subject he would discuss.
At least I had the satisfaction of rejection and criticism that I knew was unjustified and just plain wrong.
There is a certain temptation when writing an Amazon review to channel my inner book snob and berate a book and its writer . . . then the writer in me tells me to cut it out and be nice. Especially if there’s an off chance the author might actually read the review.
I did smile at some of the quoted reviews. The one that mentioned Turkish Delight was particularly amusing, and I’d bet it was tongue-in-cheek.
I like to have a sense of humor about rejection. I once wrote a guest blog at a popular Mom money saving website about preventative maintenance. I ended up with over forty comments shaming me for using Drano. You would think after the first couple people they would move past it and focus on other parts of the article. All you can do is laugh at yourself.
I also pray each day for God to establish the work of my hands. I can trust in that.
Too funny! I’d be honored to get a bad review from these literary experts. At least I’d be in good company. Turkish Delight, anyone?
Rejection comes with the territory. I expect it and even want it. How else do I define my audience? No ever said that the classics were ever appreciated by the whole world, but you will never have a classic unless you test the waters with your little bit if creativity.
I still have every rejection letter I ever received and will one day wallpaper the bathroom in my dream house with them.
Online reviews are usually written by people who can’t write books. That may seem a bit sharp but most one star reviews are senseless. I tend to read them first just to see the level of the water on the other reviews. I almost never leave 5 star reviews anymore either.
I know the old saying is: “They’re rejecting the book/idea/proposal/query and not you.” But that’s almost impossible to accept since we put our heart and soul into our work and, in essence, that is what is being criticized.
Thick skin. Thick skin. Thick skin.
Say that fast 3 times. I am SO easily amused…
Oh my mercy, that review of Narnia makes me cry and crack up at the same time!! Does Cadbury even make Turkish delight?! Oh marmalade, some people are just so….beyond description….
I looked it up, and yes, Cadbury does make it! It’s not a huge seller here on this side of the pond. Rather popular in Europe though, but then again, so is Dr Who.
OMG Rachelle – the reviews are hilarious! They say a lot more about the readers than the authors. You’ve totally made my evening’s entertainment!
The funniest rejection letter I’ve ever received was from an editor who’d taken my proposal to “committee.” He said:
“Line the cat box with this rejection letter and continue submitting your proposal to other publishers.”
Thanks for sharing these reviews, Rachelle. We’re in good company.
My funniest rejection–if this counts–was in college on an essay test. My professor wrote “Not only inaccurate, but also poorly organized.” Then she gave me half credit which seemed like a gift considering her assessment of my knowledge.
I don’t discount Amazon reviews, because they are made by book buyers, not publishing insiders. The very fact that they are made by people who are going to spend money on books makes them meaningful. Sure, some are frivolous, some are by people who are less than experts about literature, and some run counter to the judgment of history. But they represent a view of a certain segment of our audience, and should not be taken lightly.
Books of a previous generation can seldom be fully appreciated by a later generation. Concerning The Grapes of Wrath, more than one publishing insider has said that if Steinbeck proposed that book in 2010, he would have received a stock rejection. But it was totally appropriate for his world and for 1936-38. So it’s no wonder a book published in 1938 would get some bad reviews in 2012 (or whenever), no matter how well history judges that book.
Thanks for the belly laugh – and I really needed one today. Hmm. I think I’ll go have a Turkish Delight now. That will round up my day.
I tend to think of it this way… if you’re not stirring up some opposition, you must not have written anything important. And if the enemy doesn’t see you as a threat, your life is probably not making much of an impact. Living a life of truth is a battle, are you fighting or blending in? Food for thought for weathering the storm 🙂
Thanks for the laughs 🙂
The only way to completely avoid rejection is to never let anyone see our work.
Those amazon gems were the funniest quotes I’ve read in weeks. I hurt myself laughing. And that’s rare.